A Journey Through Anger, Love, and Self-Healing

Anger = Love Pissed off! The Positive Purpose of Your Negative Emotions

(From Dick Harbers’ collection, in memory of his deep wisdom and exceptional skills)

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) teaches the concept of “positive intent” – which was groundbreaking at its inception and still holds true today. In my work, I have discovered that as true as “positive intent” is, there is also “Positive Purpose”, especially concerning those emotions people (outside the NLP Model of the World at least) often label as negative, and that they somehow have to overcome those emotions or manage them (e.g. Anger Management Programs).

In this article, I address one of the so-called “negative emotions.” I’m sure those of you who have not already worked this out, will easily be able to apply this with both yourself and your clients. This case was in the very early days of Quantum Healing when I had just discovered that it was possible to elicit the resource state, The Inner Healer. This “resource” was responsive to requests and when asked would expedite the healing processes of the body and mind.

When being elicited, a resource state can present itself in any representational system (V.A.K.O.G) with any sub-modalities it “chooses”, no matter how illogical or unusual it may seem to the conscious mind. After the initial presentation is elicited, we thank it for showing itself to us in that particular way and notice how it responds to our love, gratitude, and acknowledgment.

In response, it may stay in the same representational system and change sub-modalities, or it may change representation systems, it doesn’t really matter, the important thing is to notice its response.

We then can ask if it is willing and able to heal the specific condition. An increase in the condition usually = yes, and a decrease = no. When the answer is yes, we ask the specific condition if it is willing to receive the healing energy of The Inner Healer.

 If the answer is also yes, we invite The Inner Healer’s energy to flow to the specific condition and proceed to heal it. We let it take as long as it needs, continuing to bring healing to the full and complete satisfaction of the specific condition, and the full and complete satisfaction of The Inner Healer. We proceed until the specific condition becomes fully whole, healed, and complete, through the full safety and comfort of the specific condition, of the person, and The Inner Healer. Allowing it to work more deeply and thoroughly while sleeping and dreaming and gently in the background during waking hours when the person is going about their normal daily activities.

But what do we do when The Inner Healer says no, it is neither willing and/or able?

I had been invited to the Pacific Paradise Island nation of Vanuatu and had a small group of people interested in my work. One of the participants, Mary, a young mother with a new baby, discovered that her Inner Healer presented itself as a beautiful emerald green colour, which was responsive during the workshop. Afterward, she asked if I could come to her house for a follow-up consultation to focus on something she preferred to keep private. We arranged to meet the next day.

The next morning, she confided in me that she was confused because she became very angry very easily, and feared harming her young baby. She knew she needed to do something about her anger, even though she couldn’t fathom what was causing it. At this stage, I had only “discovered” The Inner Healer, so, closing her eyes and in a light trance, we asked her Inner Healer if it was willing and able to heal whatever the Anger was about, and the answer came back, “No, it was not able, and therefore not willing!” (And my inner dialogue went “Curiouser and Curiouser!”.)

So I said to her, “What is the color of your Anger?” She replied, “Red!” So I suggested to her to

thank the Anger for showing you that it is red and notice what happens. “Oh!” she exclaimed, “It’s turned pink!” I then suggested she thank the Anger, which was red, for responding by turning pink, and ask whether it was still Anger. “Oh, no!” she said, “it is now Love!” So then I suggested she thank the Love for caring enough about something that it was willing to turn to anger to get her attention and notice how it responded. “It pulses brighter and stronger!” she said in amazement.

Then I invited her to ask the energy, that was Anger and was now Love, if it could let her know what was so important for it to become so angry. “Oh! It says that I don’t care for myself enough, that I’m always looking after other people, and now with my new baby, I’m getting close to overload!”

So I suggested that maybe she needed a self-carer resource, a Self-Nurturer perhaps. Mary nodded, “It agrees, wholeheartedly, pulsing more strongly and getting even brighter.”

“So let’s find out if you already have a Self-Nurturer, so just allow your Self-Nurturer to come to

your awareness and notice what happens.” 

After a few minutes of REM, Mary took a deep breath and said. “It’s an insipid yellow with many holes in it, so it looks a bit like Swiss cheese – but the holes are damaged.” I suggested, “Thank it for showing itself to you as insipid yellow with holes of damage, and what happens?”

“It sort of ripples a bit, and seems really tired,” Mary said. “Ask if it would like some healing love?” I said. Mary replies, “It sort of smiles and almost plaintively says, ‘Yes, please!’”

“So Mary, with your agreement, I am going to talk to your resources directly and I’m inviting your conscious mind to notice what happens as I talk with them, and for your head to nod for a yes, and shake for a no, is that okay with you? (Mary nods.) 

Thank you ... and now Inner Healer, are you able to heal the Self-Nurturer (slow slight nod) – thank you – from your response, it’s suggested that this may be difficult for you and take some time, is that correct? (Emphatic nod.)

“Thank you I also know that you weren’t able, and therefore not willing to heal whatever the Anger is about, but now that the Anger has transformed into a powerful form of Love, would you be willing to have that power help you heal the Self-Nurturer (Emphatic Nod). 

Thank you. The Red that was Anger transformed to Pink and is now a powerful Love energy, are you willing to let your energy support The Inner Healer to help it heal the Self-Nurturer until it is whole and healed and complete? (Emphatic nod.)

“Thank you. Now I invite each and every one of you to make whatever arrangements you need to make. Allow the power of the Love to flow to the Inner Healer, to energize it and give it all the power it needs to allow its healing energy to flow, to enable it to heal the Self-Nurturer until it is whole and healed and complete to the full and complete satisfaction of each and every one of you – is it possible for you all together to do all of that, with each other to the full and complete satisfaction of each and all of you?” (Smile and nod.)

“Thank you. As you continue to do that, could you ensure that Mary’s Self-Nurturer is able and willing to look after Mary in such a way that she can also care for her young baby so that both mother and child feel fully nurtured, loved, cherished, and cared for?” (Big smile and emphatic nod.)

“Thank you. As the energies between you start to flow more and more, so that the Love empowers The Inner Healer which can now more energetically heal the Self-Nurturer, I’m inviting you to do it in such a way that it is in the full safety and comfort for each and every one of you, including Mary and the baby, taking as long as you need so that the Self-Nurturer becomes whole, healed, and complete, and can again fulfill its rightful purpose to the full and complete satisfaction of each and every one of you, taking as long as you need, continuing to continue the healing process more fully and thoroughly during times of sleeping and dreaming … “ 

... and at other times more gently in the background as Mary goes about her normal daily activities, and if possible, at the same time, giving Mary’s conscious mind an indication of how long is needed for the process to complete, and when all that is set up to continue to continue to full completion, gently allow Mary to come back to the room opening her eyes naturally and easily so she is relaxed and refreshed ... take as long as you need.”

After a few moments, Mary opened her eyes, and blinked a few times as I said, “Welcome back, how was that?”

“Wow! That was amazing, I could see the energies flowing just as you suggested, and my Self-

Nurturer is already getting stronger, the yellow is getting richer and some of the smaller holes are already healed. When you asked for a time frame for when it would be done the answer was a very clear ‘Two days’. It was amazing!” “Well, I’m leaving on the late flight on that day, so I’ll check in with you in the mid-afternoon and we’ll see how things are then, okay?” Mary nodded and gave me a hug.

Two days later, all the holes in the Self-Nurturer were repaired, the color was brilliant yellow-gold and Mary said she was really looking after herself much better already as well as being really loving and caring to her baby’s needs. There was no longer any anger – and her husband was being much more helpful with the household chores.

This article was written based on the teachings of my mentor, Dick Harbers. He is the founder of the Advanced QuantumHealing modality.